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Yes, I am a single woman. So what?

Lifestyle Desk |
Update: 2014-11-11 06:12:00
Yes, I am a single woman. So what?

While marriage is definitely a beautiful institution in which a couple share their lives with each other, many couples also say they were better off being single. However, while single men seem to have all the fun, it's strange how dreadful being single can be for a woman. If a woman is single beyond a certain age (say, above the age of 25), it's not just raised eyebrows she's subjected to, but a lot of other questions and advices from almost everyone — friends and relatives to acquaintances. Here are a few things single women in India are tired listening to.

You are being extremely picky: If you are above 27, and still have rejected every possible match your relatives have suggested and are not interested in meeting any one of them, one finger suddenly points at you saying that 'you are being picky'. They believe, since you have crossed a certain age in life, you lose the right to choose, and have to settle for anything that comes your way. At times, they also deny you the right to make such an important decision of life, and think that you must decide on a life partner without much negotiation.

Your career can wait, but babies can't: They threaten you by reminding you about the various health complications women marrying at a later age face. Babies are the most common weapon. In the pretext of advice, they warn you of not being able to conceive after a certain age. They feel a woman's career is secondary as compared to starting a family and try to impose the same on you. According to them, not having a family will make you feel lonely after a point of time, and that babies are an integral part of woman's life and she needs to have them, come what may.

You can't be so career-oriented: It worries them (necessarily) that you are always busy at work, get work home and at times, also work on weekends. They reinstate that being career-oriented is not the right thing for a woman, especially if it is affecting her marriage. Even if her parents are proud of their daughter doing well professionally, relatives force them to think that she's too busy for anything in her life and that is why it is so difficult to get the right match for her.

You are perfect bride material, what's wrong?: They think that if a girl is good looking, has a nice body and a well-paying job, that qualifies her for being a good bride. They believe these are browny points that can be added to her wedding resume. In spite of all this, if a girl is single for a long time, they start suspecting there's something wrong either with her or in her horoscope, or she's simply dating someone and hiding the truth from her parents. It's simply difficult for them to accept that a beautiful, hard working and successful girl can choose to be single.

Why don't you try your luck online?: Relatives think you are desperate to get hooked to someone and take your negligence as a sign of frustration. Hence, they bring to the table the idea of looking for love online. They force you to create an account and upload your profile and 'good-looking' pictures on matrimonial sites. This is probably the only time when they do not mind you chatting for hours on the phone or on the internet, thinking you are talking to a boy who you might think of getting married to.

Don't worry, it'll happen at the right time: Although you don't want to, they feel you are extremely eager to get married and are really upset with the delay. Hence, they try to calm you down with all sorts of advices — 'It'll happen at the right time', 'God is planning something extraordinary for you', or the most annoying ones like, 'I'll pray for you'. It's at time like this that you feel like shouting from the rooftop, declaring you are not interested.

Don't you care enough about your parents?: Wondering how on earth is this issue related to your parents? Can't a single successful girl look after her parents during their old age? Do they need a son-in-law to do so? Do they need grand children to bring a smile on their face? Can't you, as their daughter, do the same by achieving bigger goals in life? These questions might haunt you every now and then, but all you should do is stop listening to them and do what you want.

Things single women should do -Enjoy life to the fullest -Concentrate on their careers -Spend quality time with family and friends -Shop to their heart's content -Aim at higher goals in life -Meet new people

BDST: 1659 HRS, Nov-11, 2014

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