The worst thing about being single is when you try to talk to women and only get rejected. Every man knows it’s hard to strike out all the time. After a while these blows to your confidence can lead to you setting yourself up for failure. Here are five things that men can do to make sure they don’t look so desperate whilst dating:
1. Don’t talk about it. Your life stinks right now, it’s true. But if that is the only thing you talk about no one is going to want to spend any time with you. Sad sacks with sob stories about being single and unlucky in love are not what women are looking for. If your primary approach to women is to reveal how horrible you feel about your love life, there is no way she is going to find you attractive. You’ll be pitied, sure, and maybe even get a hug, but no one is going to fall in love with you that way.
2. Flirting does not equal a relationship. You might think that talking to a woman for the first time means you need to be as open and sharing as if you were her long-term boyfriend. This is the 100% wrong thing to do. You are most likely going to drive her away with telling her more than she needs or wants to know about you. Flirting is a game, not a job interview. It should make her want to know you more, not less.
3. Don’t lie. You are who you are, and ultimately you aren’t going to fool her by telling her you’re someone else. Don’t feel like you need to lie to impress her. If she likes something you’re not a fan of, don’t tell her it’s your favorite too. Instead of lying, steer the conversation towards something you do like.
4. You don’t need a girlfriend right now. Half of the desperation you are feeling is made up of feeling like you are not meeting your expectations. That may be true, but the problem may be your expectations themselves. Try to realign your goals with women so that you’re not so focused on what you don’t have, but on the woman who is in front of you right now. The rest will come when you stop stressing about what will happen next.
5. Practice! Just like any performer, you need to work on your skills. You may think it’s funny, but try talking in front of a mirror. You’ll be surprised how your best lines and what you look like when you say looks to women when you have to look at yourself in the mirror. You can even try to talk to women with the sole intention of having it count as practice. Who knows, it may turn into something more real.
If you are feeling like you could use some guidance with how to effectively approach women, you should definitely check out ‘The Tao of Badass‘. This ebook and international bestseller is considered the “bible” of how to attract women and has helped thousands of previously shy men find love.
